[The first part of the letter, minus the salutation, was mimeographed to several recipients.]
Dear Patruska,
This is such a pleasant evening - I'm baby sitting with two 85 yr. old ladies. Its [sic] enough to make me eat correctly and give up smoking. One has heart trouble and is afraid of dying during the night. The other was a professional violinist and now has crippled hands. Im trying to get the violin. Things could be worse.
No one would ever live in the East after a winter out of here. My dedication to the land of make believe is now complete. Have a blond streak in my hair, wear ridiculous clothes. Sunday morning I take my breakfast of ice cream and Kellog's [sic] K out to the lawn and sun bathe. There one may observe the neighbors, in pajamas, walking dogs, watering lawns, practicing ballet.
I have started on my masters in Theatre Arts at U.C.L.A., under the motto "if you can't fight 'em, join 'em." If I can't get discovered this way I SHALL GET MARRIED, AS A GESTURE OF DEFEAT.
The first of June Elizabeth and I are sailing for Japan. Elizabeth is a co6worker [sic], very attractive, Skidmore grad., artistic, and 5 yrs. older than me which enables her to cope with any waverings in my usually steady character. I am taking this trip under various headings, the main one being "Research for Master's" which of course is a farce, but it is necessary to the financial aid forthcoming from my elders.
The best thing that has happened in months is a raise to 85 per week. But in Beverly Hills the Good Humor Mann [sic] (with whom i am intimately connected) makes more.
The night clubs here are a sight. Madison Avenue conformity has nothing on the blond plus sheath of Hollywood. The after hours expresso houses -- never have I seen wholesale seduction carried on with such style. It was like a R storation [sic] comedy.
I've been baby sitting, as mentioned, for financial relief. One child is adorable, and Catholic. Each night he kneels before me and crosses himself, than [sic] repeating the whole damn rigamaorole. [sic] The other night I told him that Jesus was a witch, and had he lived in Mass. he would have been killed much sooner. The kid lies like a trouper anyway, so I'm not in much danger.
Isn't it great being out of college. Everyday I wonder anew at this beauty which life now holds.
Brother dear, I hope that one hair is still holding out. Am glad you did not flunk out this semester. Suzanne you were always several years behind everybody else in your vices, and I'm glad that a further progression has taken place. (I refer to her smoking) Please get your Xmas present from my house. Or wait until next OCT. and I'll give it to you for your birthday. Pat the summer stock sounds great. By then I'll be so well informed, having taken baby nail hammering, etc. Ellen I'm glad you finally foound [sic] a man that suits your peculiar fancy. But please don't get married until next fall. Priscilla have you recovered? Brother Bill wrote a long desertation [sic] on the merits of your mother in respect the liberality she allowed Marge over Xmas vacation.
[The rest of the letter is handwritten.]
I really would like the stock idea. How is Larry & just what is your relationship with him now? I do wish you'd come down to U.C.L.A. Is very professional, large, room for ideas. They are quite willing to let me do anything.
Luf
M-
B.J.