[Paragraph breaks added for ease of reading.]Holyoke, June 21st 1848.
I should have written to you before, my dear brother had I dared but you said so much to me about writing to Mrs Leeds that I thought you would not probably read a letter from me till I had written to her. I thought should certainly hear from you or Father to night, from what you said I thought you would not wait to hear from me.
I have been busy every moment since I came from Northampton. You know I had some lessons to make up. It has been terribly warm weather for the past week, and I have not felt like making any very great exertions.
To night Iule had a letter of eight pages some of it crossed too from Father. I do envy her those long letters, and cant help wishing I had an older sister to write to me just so. Iule does get the greatest quantity of letters. I could bear the disappointment of not getting one myself very well, but 'tis a great aggravation to see her reading page after page at such a rate.
I had the comfort though of finding two letters from home for me when I came back that night. One was from Clara and the other from Henry. They were all pretty well. I guess they do not think of your being at home so soon as you will if you dont wait for me. I am quite anxious to hear what your decision is and hope to hear from you very soon.
I suppose your examinations closed today. Hattie in her letter spoke of seeing you last Saturday. She is a better correspondent than you for Iule owed her a letter. I did not see half enough of you in Northampton. I never say one third part that I have to say when I see any one. I really envied Maria that walk on the [...]. If you are not careful I shall be jealous of her as I used to be of Lizzies [sic] and Sarah. Did I ever tell you about it.
Maria said that John Douglass had decided to become a missionary[.] Is it so? I dont think you said any thing about it. By the way you never said any thing to me about that affair of his while you were gone. You must have thought I would hear of it when Maria and Iule knew all about it. I am afraid you do not put a great deal of confidence in me. At least that was the first thought when I heard of it. Perhaps it was a foolish one.
I wrote a long letter home today. Tomorrow they intend going onto the mountain. Iule and I are not going and will have quite a holiday at hand. I hope you will write to me very soon. I do want to hear from you. I shall feel twice as lonely when you are gone home[.] Do you think I shall see Father again before he goes home? I did not expect to. Miss Otis the young lady from Cleveland is going to Boston and will not go home for several weeks after the vacation commences. I should love to have Waldo come for me. Every day I think I am so much nearer home. I feel badly enough to night not homesick but an empty sort of feeling as though I was alone in the world. I cant help wishing there was something about me to make every body love me. 'Tis a forlorn feeling anyway. I felt a little of it on the mountain the other day. If I could only see some of the family for a little while. I have been away from them all so long I am afraid I shall be a stranger at home. But I must stop writing or I shall be tardy in retiring. Good night.
Thursday morn 5 o'clock. 'Tis a perfectly splendid day for going on the mountain, cool and clear. There are about one hundred and forty going. There is not half the pleasure in going with so many. I suppose we shall have no more hollidays [sic] this year. Six weeks from to day we shall lock up our [...] for [...]. I do wonder whether you are going now or not. Clara wrote that cousin Sarah was to leave for the East the next week. She may be at home by this time.
I hope you will write me very, very often now you have so much leisure time. You may put in all the good advice you can think of. What do you think of Festus? I thought from what you said you did not like it. 'Tis beautifully written at least some parts of it. Have you read Everycline [?]? I do not find time to read any thing here. I mean to read a great deal if I am at home next year. I mean to do a great many things, but I dont know as I shall. I wish I could write more splendid letters. I shall have to take lessons of some of your correspondents. You may give me some advice if you wish.
How lovely it must be at Uncles now. Quite a contrast after having so much company. What a change for Maria it will be. She is now Miss Whiting. I hope she will be able to support the dignity of this letter. What lady of your friends would you like most to have me like. Not that I expect to be able to be like them but I would really like to know. Iule says of Maria that she thinks she [...] too easily. Loves everybody too much. Do you think so?
Give my love to Hattie if you see her again. Love to father too. Do write as often as you can[.]
With much love your own Lizzie