Mt Holyoke Seminary
January 1857My dear dear Dora,
I cannot tell you all the grief & disappointment I have felt since I learned your loss - I had every night watched Thomas' coming with double interest for I kept on hoping I would have a letter from you while I was in Amherst - But I rather good humerdly [sic] swallowed my disappointment blaming - not you - but the bad roads and irregular mails for the trouble - besides my heart would leap with joy when occasionally the thought dashed through my mind that I would see you as soon as I got to the Seminary - As soon as I got into the house I neglected my cold hands my friends my brother & all and rushed up to your room but no Dora. Then I began to grow homesick immediately - I noticed that Lizzie looked sober but I did not wait to ask any questions but hurried to my friends - Jessie soon brought me the letter you had written for us and then I mourned for you - I tried to make the loss my own, but ah! the thought was too bitter - I could not brook it - So I only hoped & and [sic] prayed that God would be near you with His all-sufficient aid, and I wished that I could only throw my arms around your neck and mingle my tears with yours - I thought it would ease your aching heart to know that mine too was throbbing with sympathy - But most of all I wished I could read to you the 14th Chapter of John and point you to the 16th verse[.] That "other Comforter" I have "prayed the Father" to give you[.] Oh Dora, I have so often thought about this very thing - the loss of friends - and it seems as though God was too good to me to preserve all my relations, but I have thought that if God should take away any dear one it would make me better - It is the way God brings his children nearer to Himself -
I have never been so homesick since I came to the seminary as I have been this time - for I had been enjoying myself greatly at Amherst and the change was too sudden from the height of enjoyment to sorrow and disappointment - Thomas staid with us as long as he could to comfort us - but when he was gone I gave right up to my feelings - and I dont [sic] feel in any better spirits yet - And fear very much I will not till you come back - Thomas promised to write to us so that we might get a letter tomorrow night. Perhaps Iona thinks I'm doing wrong to write on the Sabbath
[change from ink to pencil]
but I knew I would not have time before Wednesday again & I could not let so long time pass before I had told you how I feel[.] My ink is frozen so that is very pale and you will have to excuse my pencilings - Jessie is almost sick and so am I. We had not a very easy time at Amherst. Our usual retiring time was 11 or 12 and after we retired it was so cold we could not sleep so we tell the folks we have come back to rest ourselves - We were blessed with company to our hearts content - How often I wished you had been there to share our merry sport, but little did I think that you were mourning while I was having so many happy visits - Jessie feels very sorry for you and says she wants to see you very much indeed[.] Lizzie & Nellie Skinner have got nicely domesticated in 121 - And now dear Dora what made you ask us "not to forget you"? Had you any such hard unhappy thought? You must never distrust your own Annie at least - She will ever love you[.]
Geo. Beckwith I fear has been tried too by the loss of his father. The last we heard of him he was fearing he would not get better and also there was that he himself would be sick from watching and care - If his father should die Geo. could not graduate this year but would have to stay with his mother & sister - Poor boy - I pity him - And another thing that troubles me Dora is the news that our friends have lost money by the failure of a bank - I have a little reason to be sad - but when I compare my trials with my friends I can but be very thankful - The girls are all anxious to know about you - whether you are coming back soon - how you are in health & mind &c. Miss Jessup made mention of you in her prayer the other morning[.] I hope you will soon be among us, and we will do all we can to heal your bleeding heart[.]
Jessie & Nellie & Lizzie & ever so many girls write with me in sending love
Your own aff.
Annie Grassie[This letter was purchased separately from the rest of the Kasson collection, and had no envelope, but the familiar names of Annie and Jessie and Dora helped me connect it to the collection. A little sleuthing with the family tree revealed that Dora's middle name is McCall, and that Dora's sister Charlotte Elizabeth died on Jan 14, 1857.]